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Saturday, September 08, 2001
2:58:00 PM by mark *
If I were to get hooked on another videogame, I can't think of one coming up that interests me as much as World of Warcraft Check out the screenshots. Once they fix the nasty parallax illusion and add some polygons to the models that is going to be one cool looking game. And for some reason (say 4 games and counting?) I trust them to write a compelling game. Plus, with an acronym like WoW the reviews will just write themselves. =)
10:10:00 AM by mark *
OK, you wanna hear something weird? I had a bad day yesterday. Busy day, kept getting distracted and didn't finish what I wanted to at work. Long meeting that sucked my life away. The people who were gonna call me didn't. Me and the roommate didn't wind up eating till after 8pm because our jobs suck. I ate too much and had indigestion. I have killer allergies plus a low-grade fever so I can't hardly breathe through my nose no matter what I take. I didn't get anything done on the website yesterday, at all. I missed half of the only TV show I wanted to see all week. (Lexx) And to top it all off I had a headache too.

The weird part is that after I finally got to sleep around 1am, I slept like a stone. So today, I'm still ill, still acid-stomached, still headached, and still waaay behind on everything but I woke up at 8:30am and feel more rested than I have in weeks. =) Weird, huh?

Friday, September 07, 2001
1:20:00 PM by Nemo *
Some of you Bridge Builder fans out there might get a kick out of this piece of software. Combining the two might be real fun. Maybe we should ask one of the sequel projects to add this kind of functionality.
12:25:00 PM by Nemo *
Could someone please explain to my disbelieving brain some valid and persuasive reasons why I should not buy any of these fun and wonderful kits?
Thursday, September 06, 2001
7:09:00 PM by mark *
What, no mythical "Hydra" reference when speaking of the post-Napster free music abundance? Are these newsmen skipping classical edjumacation and leaping straight into newsrooms?

Hell, I suppose they are jumping so fast they are leaving clothes behind. And it seems to be working. =)

6:20:00 PM by mark *
The MED joins the OED in dictionary stardom. Plenty of people love this work. It may be a bit pricy in print if there are really are 115 fascicles at $25 each. Woof. Maybe they will put out a CDROM? *sniff* And I haven't even gotten rich so that I can afford the $900 OED disk. =(
4:48:00 PM by mark *
A friend sent this too me: (I've invited him to blog to save myself some typing. His line at the end is better than anything I'd have added. =)

Bet you didn't know that these were the words to the Chinese National Anthem

March of the Volunteers

Arise, those who do not want to be slaves! We will use our flesh and blood to build another Great Wall. China has reached the brink of national collapse. All the people have been making their last outcry. Arise! Arise! Arise! All our hearts become one. Let us face the angry guns. March on! Let us face the angry guns. March on! March on! March on! On!

Sounds like they ripped off the East German national anthem from Top Secret.

2:16:00 PM by mark *
This cheered me up, Poor get Net Access. And I can't believe I missed New M&Enemas or Teen Killed... Man I can't wait for SatireWire to start cranking out the humor again.
Wednesday, September 05, 2001
10:47:00 PM by mark *
Speaking of comics (well, not really) I just want to mention once again that I read JerkCity not for the regular and tired "gay" humor but for the occasional, epic diamonds in the rough.

Prior favorites include this gem and this beauty and this subtle shard.

9:01:00 PM by mark *
Oh yeah, I added my favorite e-mail lists to the left side over there. Reproduced here for posterity.
Spam I Really Want
NextDraft
Davenetics
Joe Lavin
Ruminations
TopFive
Ditherati
StratFor
Politics@Yahoo
World Wide Words
8:51:00 PM by mark *
Well, I dunno what the heck is going on around me this week, apparently. I tried to get dinner tonite from two different places that have each been shut down and boarded up -- and in once case knocked down -- for weeks. How sad is that? Not that either of them were critical feeding troughs, they were just fast food places but it sure is weird to have to eat at your third choice for the evening due to a severe case of bull dozer.
4:01:00 PM by Nemo *
Ok, yes this is linked off memepool, but no, I don't care, 'cuz its cool as all bloody hell.
Lego Mindstorm Rubic's Cube Solver
3:49:00 PM by mark *
I got stuck working in the Network Ops Center today so there was precious little time for surfing or posting today at work. Hopefully I'll get some leisure time tonite. =) ...but I wanted to share a couple rude things from last night and I finally found 5 minutes to do it.

While eating dinner last night we were sucked 16 years back to low grade highschool humor and started making bad puns and jokes about pie. Both kinds are edible if you follow me. Most of it was low-brow foolishness but one gem that we sorta worked our way up to was "Summer's Eve Pie Filling" for which I hereby promise I will never make a fake banner-ad.

Later last night I started yet another juvenile round of joking with "Goolie's Spicy Nut-Clusters: You can't kick 'em!" Which just might make a good banner. =)

Tuesday, September 04, 2001
5:05:00 PM by mark *
Well then we must find a way to determine when they are speeding with a legitimate need, (getting to a scene of violence or trouble without alerting the ne'er-do-wells, for instance) and when they are merely taking liberties with a false privilege. We must either give up on a useful method of approaching a scene, find a way to discriminate the cases clearly and publicly so that the common citizen can cry foul, or trust them to restrain themselves (which, arguably, isn't working for shit).
3:53:00 PM by Dodd *
Regarding certain police behaviour, I'm afraid I must file a separate opinion, concurring in part and dissenting in part....
"[C]ertain police officers get the use of patrol cruisers as personal vehicles. Generally this is a perk for doing a good job or because they are an on-call detective. Only the best of the police force get to drive home in their patrol vehicles. The trade off for getting that vehicle is they are half-way on duty all the time.... Your tax dollars aren't buying him a free car, they are buying you twice the police presence for pennies on the dollar to their usual rate....

[T]he cops are supposed to be speeding without their lights on. We paid good money to hire people who have been trained to drive like that. They are patrolling folks, they need to catch up to the reckless speeders or it doesn't fucking work. Duh."

I wholeheartedly agree with the former, because I know that allowing police officers to take their patrol cars home does in fact serve the purpose of increasing police presence. That's a good thing, and pretty cheap, too. And besides, it's not like we pay cops well or anything. A small cost perk like that isn't a big deal, espcially since we get direct benefits from it.

As to the latter, I must vociferously disagree. Cops don't do 90 with no sirens on the 264 because they're trying to catch up to someone. They do it because they can - no-one will pull them over and give them a ticket. The most effective means of enforcing speed limits is for a cop to drive down the freeway at the posted limit. Not a soul will pass him. Less effective, but far too remunerative for them to ever give it up, is setting up a speed trap. Blazing down the freeway at 90, which they would give me a 6 point ticket for, is not a means to a legitimate end for an on-duty cop.

Patrol cars have sirens to alert people when they're on a call or to pull over a malefactor. They drive 90 with no lights or sirens for no other reason than that they can get away with it. And that is not a perk we should be allowing. The rule technically is that they should be abiding by the same laws we have to except when it is necessary, in a specific case, not to. I aver that our men in blue should be strictly required to abide by that rule.

3:20:00 PM by mark *
Urethane tires move closer to reality for cars. Once upon a time, in Denver, if you mentioned the very thought of this the people who worked or had family at Gates Rubber would have beat you to death. =)
3:00:00 PM by mark *
Ah, animal cracker distribution research continues. I still am not sure that that is a penguin. Maybe he should research other flightless fowl that could be in a zoo. Sure, penguins are popular with the ladies but that may not be related.

Read up on zoo animal crackers with help of Google. Check out the ranting, the selling, the name dropping, the gibbering, the prefix matching, the decorating, the fetishing, and composing.

BTW, at the age of 32 I still ritually behead them with the first bite. Sad but true.

12:48:00 PM by mark *
Quoting from a paper I read, (since I seem to be police and law obsessed this week):
Oh and let's not forget about the regular activities: Taking the wife and kids out on a family outing in the police cruiser that taxpayers are paying for, and the ever-popular doing 90 miles per hour on the highway with no lights or siren on! They're doing the very things they arrest civilians for every day!

First off, we need to stick to one exclaimation point per paragraph please. =) Thanks

Secondly, certain police officers get the use of patrol cruisers as personal vehicles. Generally this is a perk for doing a good job or because they are an on-call detective. Only the best of the police force get to drive home in their patrol vehicles. The trade off for getting that vehicle is they are half-way on duty all the time. If someone flags them down while they are on the way to the daughter's soccer practice then they get to stop and make her late. Your tax dollars aren't buying him a free car, they are buying you twice the police presence for pennies on the dollar to their usual rate. And why complain about the cop with kids and a wife. The cops with family and ties to the neighborhoods are the ones who don't get into other trouble. If any of my tax money isn't laser-focussed on a direct benefit, please spend it like this rather than giving it to crack addicts and lottery officials. Thanks.

Third, the cops are supposed to be speeding without their lights on. We paid good money to hire people who have been trained to drive like that. They are patrolling folks, they need to catch up to the reckless speeders or it doesn't fucking work. Duh. Plus, if they flip on the lights they warn people they are coming which really doesn't help them do their job. Lights and sirens are for announcing their presense in an emergency and making sure people know they are coming, they are really useless for sneaking up on people and catching them.

12:10:00 PM by mark *
Have you flown on an airplane? In bad weather? If so you have no doubt encountered the wonderful experience of turbulence. The shaking and shuddering are fun. The sound of the plane (which honestly is way louder than you thought even a craft tearing itself apart could get) is nightmareish. The huge *whomp-whomp* and thudding as you cut through different air streams is unreal. Your teeth are rattling and your guts are jumping around and all the sudden you can feel the belt around your waist as your shoulders lift away from the seat just a hair. Basically it is everything you pay for when riding a rollercoaster only you can't get off and there is no height requirement.

The worst of it was the sudden silent drop. You are slamming left and right and bouncing and all the sudden it is like you popped over a rise at high speed. All at once it is quiet, smooth and you are plummeting to your doom with your heart and stomach competing for space in your now crowded neck. And then you hit the bottom of the low pressure zone and *wham* you smack seat like a rocket when off. Those express elevator escapades always get the screaming to stop for a second. It isn't that easy to scream when your small intestine is taking holiday in your ribcage, I suppose.

The reason that all this comes up is that I was telling a friend of mine (who complained to me about how air-headed some of her family is) about a friend of mine from years ago. Conversing with that girl (a blonde who knew more blonde jokes than me) was occasionally just like the worst turbulence described above. She wasn't air-headed, she was in fact pretty darn smart. She just had this way of conversing where, once in a while, she could rip the whole universe out from under you, leaving you gasping for air and wondering how bad hitting bottom was going to be. Which is why, rather than calling her "Air-head" we called her "Air-Pockets". *whoomp*

Monday, September 03, 2001
11:30:00 PM by mark *
I spent way too much time today reading these fabulous police reports. I'm a sucker for police stories and I grovel at the feet of people who can trip $5 words off their pen like they were butter. A writer who does both is like feeding hyperkinetic children sugar, it seems funny at first and then you start wondering if you are warping time and space itself. Well, ok, that is a really bad analogy but it is late and I've just spent the day visiting family after reading pages and pages of delicious sugar.
Sunday, September 02, 2001
9:59:00 PM by mark *
Do you get mailing lists? I do. I love them. At one point I was subscribed to mutliple opensource groups and political groups at the same time. 300+ messages a day takes quite a toll on a person's brain after a while so I eased up. Since I do get a lot of links to complain about here off of them I should mention them. In fact, I think I will add the to the right side bar under "ye olde tyme bloges". One I won't be adding but wanted to at least mention was This Is True.

TiT (which I doubt is how it is often abbreviated) is the dubitable distinction of being the only list I ever dropped in disgust. Don't get me wrong here, Randy is one funny guy and I really enjoyed the list for more than a year (Oct 1998 to Jan 2000). I even recommend it to people who like weird news and topical headline humor. But for some reason I've since forgotten the details too I decided I wouldn't add to the reader count of a man who would insult and demean his own readers. In fact he went so far as to state something along the line of "well if you don't like 'X' why keep reading my work?" In that case 'X' was quite far from the stated goal of making fun of true stories and headlines and I thought it was quite reasonable of people to be annoyed with him turning a humor list into a pulpit for those opinions. I no longer remember the details but I do remember it being the only time I couldn't fairly answer that "why keep reading if" question. So I stopped. And I doubt I'll go back.

9:18:00 PM by mark *
Well, when you first read about Chillin' Woman it seems like a fairly lighthearted stab at Burning Man. Except laden with obscure insider jokes and jargon.

But then you read on and discover that it has moved on from satire and sarcasm into ruining other people's fun. The problem with any large event in these media saturated days is that it is an instant opportunity for assholes and whiners to get get free press for whatever cause-of-the-day they wish to air. And what are they protesting, really? Being treated poorly because they stood around gawking in the aisles rather than lifting a finger to add to the atmosphere of the party. Oh and they hate that it isn't called burning "person" and that the attractive young women run around half-nekkid. Not that there aren't plenty of men running around half nekkid, mind you; they only are annoyed with the young women.

Maybe if we get lucky this "I wanna fuck up everything you love because I don't like it" will bring about another good bout of prohibition and we can watch this nation tear itself apart like last time. I guess it is easier to preach tolerance once you've crushed all detail and variation out of the world.

8:36:00 PM by mark *
My new word of the [random time period] is hypnotiquette: the rules governing proper behavior while hypnotizing someone.

For instance, forcing them to quack like a duck and pretend to hit a home run is acceptable only in public performances but never in church. Making then strip off all their clothing is rarely acceptable hypnotiquette unless you are performing on the playboy channel or the girl is really cute and is attending a party I'm at. Making ugly people think they are sexy is 100% forbidden.

8:08:00 PM by mark *
Ouch, my mutual funds aren't doing that bad but they ain't making me any money... Of course, I picked funds that were only hip deep in high-tech and foreign investments, not neck deep. They actually have a chance to bounce back up in the next 5 to 10 years. (I hope. *gulp*)
2:02:00 PM by mark *
Or maybe I could spend the day reading random facts about favorite authors.
1:04:00 PM by mark *
Holiday weekends rule. Three days off from work is more than I've had in ages. And, I've been SOOO useless. Ahhhh. I think I may even play videogames today, or play with photoshop, or go watch another movie on TV. Ah...